I use to be happy with my body.
I used to love my figure. I use to look at myself in the mirror and have confidence, and now all I see staring back at me is this unhappy person. I weighed 128lb a year and a half ago, now I weigh 170lb. I gained 40lb in a total of two months. The reason why? I was creating a new life with a heart beat. A child. I sadly miscarried and whenever I see myself all I see is a horrible reminder of what was lost.
After my miscarriage all I wanted to do was return to where I was before my pregnancy. I did everything I could, I worked out, I ate right, and I even started new programs but nothing changed, in return I gained stretch marks, dimples, rolls, and everything a woman doesn't want.
I cried myself to sleep almost every night hoping and praying that it was all a bad dream.
I did everything to hide my shameful body.
I stopped doing things that would make a young woman happy, like wearing a nice pair of shorts, going swimming, tanning with your best friends.
I was too embarrassed by the way I looked.
Women are always going to find imperfection in the way they look, I know I did, but I'm looking forward to what the future has in store for me.
Even though I dug myself into a hole, I am slowly digging a tunnel out. I have been working out harder than ever, I have been slowly gaining my confidence back, even though I am not able to be where I was.
I know that happiness does not come from what you look like on the outside but comes from how you feel on the inside.
My journey just doesn't end here, I am pushing myself to such great heights.
I am beautiful.
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